mygod | pc catchall | astarion

[flameguard]

the internet is rife with astarion memes

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[flameguard]

[ there's - the comment almost makes him laugh, this short, sort of startled noise, and rondo shakes his head. it snaps him right out of the old memories. ]

No... no, of course not. [ yeah not a chance. rondo incorruptible ravus over here. ] It was... I was more shocked he asked.

[haematocritical]

Hmm. Really?

[ he must be rather devoted then, if the thought surprises him. ] If you were good at what you do, it's hardly surprising he would want to keep that for himself, no?

[flameguard]

I --

[ rondo falters, here. if he was good at what he does. is he? did sazantos think so? that was part of what made it all so strange. the offer had been so bizarre it threw him for a loop.

he looks down at his lap. ]

... He never... I can count the number of times that he has said that I did something well on one hand.

[ in fact - the ten words of praise that sazantos said to rondo when he was just thirteen years old that changed his life. Boy... you've got the makings of the Flame in you. it's why he's here. so it's hard to reconcile with the idea that sazantos - in his moment of betrayal, after everything - still wanted to have rondo by his side. not that he ever would have accepted. maybe it was a trick. he still doesn't know. ]

[haematocritical]

[ it's not a kindness, what he wants to say. which is essentially "he wouldn't have bothered, if you were worth nothing." it could be taken as something positive -- you're worth something, don't worry! but his thoughts on why someone would keep a hold on you are not so rosy or kind.


he doesn't get to say anything though, as it's his turn to have his memories paraded around. ]

[flameguard]

[ crawls back here now that i'm not dying from cyoa jesus christ.

but, oh. luckily, the memory comes in and interrupts the conversation. rondo's quiet throughout the entire thing, his eyes very wide as he processes.

... it's not the kind of story that he's familiar with, but he's too empathetic not to feel for astarion on each beat of the story. the gnawing, aching feeling of guilt. the fear, at the beginning. the sense and need for vengeance, for closure. it's like ceraphina, he thinks with a start, but...

rondo swallows. ]

... Did... were you able to? [ kill him. ]

[haematocritical]

[ fluffs a pillow for you.

astarion's quiet for a moment. ]

.. Mm, yes actually. Just before I got here.